4.1

05-01-16_7-58-45 PM

“Five more minutes, Mum!” I said and sprinkled a bit of cheddar on our omelettes.

“Thank you, Gary! I’ll be right down!”

I smiled and placed two plates on the counter next to me, turning down the heat a little as I went. Breakfast was ready, but Mum had a long morning routine. She spent a few hours every morning on some focusing yoga routine, and got up long before I did to fit everything into her morning. She started work at nine am every day, so there wasn’t much time.

That’s why I made breakfast! I loved cooking, and that way we both had something warm to eat before I left for school and Mum went to work. Mum was a cop and needed the energy, and I was happy to cook just for the sake of it. Mornings could be hard, but when the house smelled of pancakes, or french toast?

07-31-16_2-57-35 PM

We were lucky to live so close to a river. I always spent some time at the weekend catching fresh fish for our dinners, and it was a great break from school and homework.

Not as great as my garden, though.

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When I had first shown an interest in cooking, not just with helping Mum set the table, Mum had suggested setting aside a small spot in our garden for me to grow my own fruit and veg. I hadn’t been convinced at first, but I got into it quickly. It was so rewarding to see the tomatoes I had planted sprout and gain colour, and there was nothing better than a dinner cooked with my own ingredients.

I didn’t think that Mum had expected it to last, but five years later and my little garden was our primary source of fresh food.
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Mum was my inspiration. She loved cooking almost as much as I did, and it was because of her that I got into it at all. She always asked me if I wanted to help her when she made lunch, or dinner, and once I was old enough to do most of it myself she let me. She still operated the hob and oven until I was older, but I loved doing as much as I did.

Besides Mum, I watched cooking shows on TV. I got so many ideas from them and usually couldn’t wait to try them. Mum was my first food tester, and often Grandma and Grandpa Milan volunteered as well.
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There was so much I could do with food. It could be refreshing, warming, comforting, memory-evoking, and it made people feel good. I couldn’t think of a better way to spend my life than by doing just that.

06-12-16_7-05-48 PM

Mum and I were close. I never knew my Dad, and I had no siblings, so Mum and I spent a lot of our free time together. We usually watched the Great Simtonian Bake-Off with dinner, or Sim Chef, and we always bounced ideas. Cooking wasn’t Mum’s calling, but she always had ideas for me regardless. At school most of the kids either hated their parents, were caught in the middle of a divorce, and tried to spent as much time away from home as possible. I didn’t know my Dad, but Mum and I were nothing like that. When I was younger Mum had told me why I didn’t know my Dad, and what Grandpa Milan had done for our family. I had been sad at first; I didn’t want to fall in love and get married right now, but knowing that I’d never have that option still hurt. Still, Mum and Grandma were hopeful. They said that the universe was righting itself. That my child might have a chance at love.

But that was way too far in the future. When Mum had told me all that she had said that it was her and me against the world, and that’s exactly what we were. My family was weird and complicated, and according to Grandpa Milan we shouldn’t even be here,but we were closer than any other family I knew.

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Grandma and Grandpa Milan lived close to us, and usually Mum and Grandma talked every other day over the phone, but we still went out together once a month to catch up. That was my other source of inspiration – the places we went to were amazing, and the food we had there was what had made me realise what I wanted to do with my life.

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I was going to be a chef, and maybe one day I’d own my own restaurant.

***

Just to give you a quick update of where everyone’s at: Sophia is lvl 9 in her career now, so she’s very nearly there!

Gary’s aspiration (in case you couldn’t guess from the chapter) is Master Chef, and his traits are Good, Neat, and Essence of Flavour, which he got from his aspiration. He’s currently lvl 5 of the cooking skill, lvl 3 of the fishing skill, and lvl 2 of the gardening skill 🙂 I’ve given him the side mission to create ambrosia for Sophia, hence the fishing and gardening skills ^-^

I also didn’t have time to edit this, and because it’s not my book I’m trying not to care so apologies if there are mistakes in this 🙂

Interlude

“Make it quick, mortal.”

He balled his hands into fists, and reminded himself that he needed to stay calm. It had taken the spirits a while to agree to this meeting. Now that he was here he wouldn’t waste the opportunity.

He had already achieved more than any other human alive, had asked for more than any other human alive – and he’d been granted it. He needed no favours this time, only an answer. A simple thing.

He had promised her.

He hadn’t expected to become a part of their family. If he could help by asking one simple question, then he would.

“Was it Sophia’s fault that Emery Dwyer died?” 

In front of him, the spirit broke into a grin. The spirit inside him moved around like an excited child in a bouncy castle. 

His palms were sweating, and his forehead was wet. 

“You beg an audience for this? You used to be more ambitious, mortal.”

“I’m not here for myself.”

The spirit’s grin widened, and he no longer knew what he was dealing with. Most spirits were curious, but there were others. Benevolent ones. Malevolent ones. Once he had confused the spirit that used him as a host as the latter, but in time he had realised that he’d been wrong. The spirit he shared a body with – the spirit that had kept him alive for so long – was merely curious.

He didn’t think that the one he was talking to now was merely curious.

“No, you are here for her. Another mortal. The reason the universe is in turmoil.”

“In turmoil?” He’d known when he had asked his favour many years ago that he was manipulating things out of reach to humans. Resurrecting the dead wasn’t within their abilities for a reason, yet he had asked – no, begged – it regardless. He had believed her family to be what the world needed. Had he been wrong?

“Your little experiment has shaken the universe and the stars themselves, mortal. What did you expect?”

He swallowed. That was a very good question. What did he expect? Not this.

But his time was limited. He could only stay for so long, and he wouldn’t leave without an answer. 

“Was it her fault? Is she responsible for his death?”

The spirit laughed. “You are asking the wrong questions, mortal.”

He thought for a second, and grew cold when he considered the impossible. “Will the universe recover?”

A hundred grins appeared around him, and for the first time he saw the spirit world as it truly was. He was merely a visitor, a guest. This was their home, and they were everywhere and in all things.

“It has already started, mortal. The universe was… unsure, when we gave her life. It was unsure, too, when we halted her ageing. But the universe is larger than you can imagine. It can deal with all manner of things, and it can recover from worse.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

“She is not to blame for the man’s death. Not directly. Her actions sent smaller ripples through the nebulae than her mother’s actions, or her grandmother’s.”

He felt dizzy at the implications. “Does this mean that she can find love, and grow old with someone?

The grins around him dimmed. “No. Not her. It is too early.”

“But one day? Will her son be able to?”

“I do not know, mortal. I only know that your request and our granting it has forever changed the way of things. I cannot say if that is for better or for worse, only that it is.”

He smiled, despite it all. Sophia wouldn’t get her happily ever after, but perhaps it was possible for Gary. How could this be for the worst? Love was always a good thing. The spirits didn’t understand – they didn’t love as humans did – but he understood. 

One day his family would find love, and he looked forward to the day it happened.

3.14

11-21-15_12-10-44 PM

Gary was a very smiley baby, and the first soft tufts of brown hair were starting to show on his head. His eyes were so much like Emery’s it was impossible not to see him in his son. I wondered if he would look like me at all when he was older, but loved him all the same. Emery had been a handsome man, and I didn’t care who Gary took after more. He was healthy and happy, that was all I wanted.

Half a year after he was born, Mum was hospitalized. Grandma called and told me what the doctors had told her – that we should say goodbye now if we wanted to have the chance. I wasn’t sure whether I should arrange for someone to look after Gary or whether he should come with me, but decided to take him with me in the end. Mum wouldn’t get to see him grow up. I wanted her to be able to see him again.

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I stayed for the funeral. Once I was back home I put all my energy into losing the baby fat. I was still on maternity leave for another month, so I hadn’t had the same kind of busy routine I’d had before Gary was born. My body wasn’t used to being lazy, and the first two weeks of working out did a number on my body. I felt like I was sore everywhere, even though my boxing bag was my only training partner.

It felt good to be more active again. I loved being home with Gary but I looked forward to being back at work, too.

11-21-15_1-14-35 PM - Copy

Chief Chau put me on a number of different jobs, to help me get settled back in. I wanted something bigger, but she insisted I take it slow after having been gone for months. I knew she was right, but I missed being on the street, fighting crime directly. All I could do here was take fingerprints and take mugshots. The things some of the criminals thought they could smuggle into prison amazed me every day.

And then, finally, we received a bit of good news.

Blaine Raegan had died in prison.

I thought I’d be ecstatic, but instead I only felt relief. It really was over now. The man I had sworn I’d hunt down was gone. Mum and Emery could rest in peace, and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

Grandma and Grandpa Milan moved closer to me. Now that Mum was gone they wanted to be closer to their family and bought a house together, only two roads away from me. Having them so close to me felt great, and I loved that they’d be a part of Gary’s life.

11-21-15_1-02-09 PM - Copy

“I love your house, Grandpa.” Grandpa Milan had insisted that I don’t call him ‘Grandpa’ since we weren’t related, but I insisted. He felt like a grandfather to me, and using the title felt natural. He had earned it, and I wasn’t about to let him forget how important he was to us.

“Your grandmother chose it. She has good taste.” They had turned the small spare bedroom into an office for her, so she could continue writing her books.

“I need to talk to her. Does she have a moment?” I didn’t want to interrupt her while she was writing, but there was something important I needed to ask her.

“Of course!” I got up, ready to knock on her door when he stopped me. “Wait. Sophia, I’ve been meaning to talk to you. I don’t want you to think that I’ve forgotten about what you’ve asked me. I’ve been trying to get in touch with the spirits, but they haven’t been very… forthcoming.”

My heart sank. “What do you mean?”

“It’s their realm, their home. I can’t force my way in, and neither can the spirit that lives inside me since he’s bound to me.”

“I don’t understand.” What did this mean? Did the spirits avoid him because they knew I was right? Did spirits have appointments? Would they care whether their answer hurt me or not?

“I’ll keep trying, Sophia. I promise.”

I nodded, needing to change the subject.

“Sit down over there,” he said, and nodded to the table. “I’ll get Morrigan.”

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I quickly went to check up on Gary who slept in his pram in the kitchen, and sat down.

“I need to ask you a favour,” I said once we were all sitting together. “A big one.” Grandma was as dedicated to our strange cause as anyone could be. If anyone agreed, it’d be her.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

“I was wondering if you could write about what happened here, at the police department. We’ve got the names of officers, politicians and other high-ranking people who were all conspiring with Blaine. If you write about it – an accurate record, not the stuff they publish in the paper – you could stop the same thing from happening again.” I didn’t know if it would really work. It could backfire, too, and people could end up blaming us for allowing the corruption to get so out of hand in the first place.

Grandma nodded. “That would help us work towards a better future, if the people were to be made aware. I see what you’re getting at.”

“Blaine was a bad man,” I said, my hands balled into fists. “I want people to understand how influential criminals can get, how ruthless they can be, and that it’s possible to stop people like him.”

There was a gleam in Grandma’s eyes that gave me hope. “A story like this could really inspire someone, Soph.”

“Your name is famous. If you write it they will read it.”

If I didn’t know my Grandma any better I’d have thought she blushed. “I’d love to help you. Of course I’ll do it.”

“I’ll speak to the Chief on Monday. We might be able to give you access to our files.”

For the first time since Emery’s death I felt truly hopeful. I had lost Emery and I had lost Mum, but I had Gary, Blaine Raegan was dead and with Grandma’s help we could really do some good. It was exciting to think about it all.

11-21-15_12-26-02 PM - Copy

I had achieved my dream. My father was gone. My future belonged to my son now. When Chief Chau asked me to be her replacement, I would accept. Willow Creak wasn’t a large city by any means, but I’d make it a save place for Gary and all other residents. Something like what had happened with Blaine wouldn’t happen again. Not on my watch.

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I could focus on work while I was at the station, but while I was home I belonged to Gary. Being a single Mum wouldn’t be easy, but my grandparents weren’t far away any more and I’d manage on my own. Gary would have everything he needed to be happy.

I swore my life on it.

———————————

Extra Pic

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I gave Morrigan and Milan a small make-over to go with their new home ^^

Apologies if Lilliana’s death seemed sudden. I’m sure you wanted pictures. I did, too. The game didn’t even tell me that she was close to dying, so I was just as surprised as you were when her portrait was greyed out -.-

3.13

10-02-15_8-10-27 PM

The nursery was the first room in my new house that I decorated. Mum, Grandma and Grandpa Milan helped me pick the furniture and move things around until I was happy with it all. It was a bare room, with the mere essentials – just the cot, a couple of pictures and a mobile – but money was tight and I did what I could. My family offered to chip in more and buy the baby some presents, but I wanted to do this on my own. I was starting over, and I needed to do it alone.

10-02-15_8-06-00 PM

I loved the house. It wasn’t as big as Mum’s but it was bigger than my previous home and it was cosy. The rooms weren’t too large – in fact, the kitchen was a little small – and I found it easier to relax every day. It was hard, thinking about Emery but at least we hadn’t shared this house. Besides cooking and his favourite TV shows there was nothing here to remind me of him, and I was grateful for the fresh start.

The only time I really felt his absence was at work. Chief Chau hadn’t assigned me a new partner for the time being since I was a Sergeant now and she knew that I could this alone. At first I had been mad, but the more time passed the more grateful I was. She was right, I could do this on my own, and I had a feeling that maybe she was testing me. Layla was a good Chief but she had never wanted the position and would have been happier in another. She did her best and wasn’t going to leave the job without good reason, but I knew that she wanted a replacement.

There was chatter around the office that she wanted me to be that replacement.

10-02-15_8-07-21 PM

I didn’t know if it was true, I was nowhere near being promoted to Chief, but it gave me something to focus on. At home I had the baby, and at work I had a new goal. I didn’t want to be coddled but it was nice to be looked out for, and I welcomed the distraction.

10-02-15_8-09-00 PM

Especially when Mum had a nasty fall in the shower. She broke an arm and her right foot, and was banned from working out until everything had healed. With everything that had happened I hadn’t even considered her health, or her age, but Grandma gave me the gentle nudge I needed to face the inevitable. Mum was getting old, and unlike Grandma and Grandpa Milan she wasn’t immortal. She had lived a good, healthy life, but sooner or later…

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I didn’t want to think about it just yet. For the time being Mum was still very much alive, and I had baby-prep to do. I read every book on pregnancy and birth preparation that I could find, and I even started watching kids shows on TV. I didn’t know if it was hormones or if I had genuinely developed an interest in Pokemon, but it was addictive and I couldn’t stop. Inside me my baby was moving and punching, and I knew he or she was happy, too.

I had failed Emery and my baby did not face the kind of future I had always wanted for my kids, but I wouldn’t fail him or her, too. I’d do my best to be a good Mum. We didn’t have much to look forward to with our fate looming over our heads, but we’d have each other and I’d be damned if I let this baby down!

10-02-15_8-26-54 PM

When I was only a month away from my due date everything hurt. My back was killing me, my feet were swollen and ached whether I stood up or sat down, and I was huge. My family visited as often as they could and even moved in for the last two weeks, but Mum’s constant reassuring cooing at my massive belly only helped so much. I was ready for this baby to be born, now.10-02-15_8-25-22 PM

Finally, a week after my due date, my water broke. I had gotten up at 2am because I was starving and needed pancakes, and was in the middle of mixing the dough when the worst pain imaginable shot through me. Everyone was asleep since it was the middle of the night, but they woke up instantly when I screamed.

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Unlike me who had read all those books they were much better prepared. Everyone was running through the house getting me the things I needed, while I tried my best not to freak out. I was giving birth, to my and Emery’s baby. Right. Fucking. Now.

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Mum helped me through the contractions and I was immensely grateful that they were there. Grandpa Milan waited outside but Mum and Grandpa were with me, making sure I had everything I needed.

After ten hours of wishing the little one would just pop out already, it was time.

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My son, my Gary, was born, and I could see the resemblance to Emery already. I loved him instantly.

——————–

Just to give you an idea of where things are at-

Sophia is currently a Sergeant as I mentioned above, that translates to lvl 6 of her career. In her aspiration she’s still lvl 1 since it’s the successful lineage one and she needed to have a child before I could make any progress 🙂 Now that Gary was born it should progress nicely since most of the goals are set around interacting with her kid. Before you get excited – she only needs the one child to max it out, so sadly no more babies are required 😉

I hope this gives you an idea of how things are progressing 🙂

Death in TS4

Hi everyone,

I just quickly wanted to put a warning/disclaimer out there, regarding how Death is treated in TS4 because it’s becoming an issue for me and this blog.

In TS3, when a sim was about to die of old age, the game gave you a 24-hour warning so your sims could wrap up any business with relatives and close friends. It was great for us story tellers because we could prepare for it and incorporate the death of a previous generation or beloved aunt smoothly into the story. Once the sim had died you got another message, saying your sim’s friend or relative had now passed on.

TS4 does neither. Sims just die, and the only way to find out is when you want to invite someone over and see them either gone from the relationship window or greyed out. There’s no 24-hour warning and no notification upon death.

This means that I can’t plan for it in this story. I’d love to do something, maybe a last scene at the hospital or something like that, but because of how the game works that’s not possible.

You can change your settings to only your played households ageing, which means that ageing works again as it did in TS2. However, if you do make sure you set ageing for your played households to ‘active households only’ – any other households you have placed yourself will otherwise continue to age up. It’s not a great fix but it’s better than nothing. If anyone knows of a mod that can give you a similar death warning as TS4 had, please let me know.

I apologise if the deaths of some sims seem sudden and cold. They’re a surprise to me, too.

Thank you for reading,

MischiefTheKitten

3.12

10-02-15_7-12-20 PM

I couldn’t stay in this house any more. When I had bought it I had dreamed of a family, kids, a white picket fence – none of those things had happened since then. Instead, only bad things had happened inside this house and I couldn’t wait to see the back of it. First Blaine had threatened me, then Mum told me that Momma had passed away, Blaine attacked me and fatally injured Emery – I needed to get out and start over. Maybe a family and children were still somewhere in my future, but they weren’t here.

Together with Mum I looked over some listings and after four viewings I chose the perfect house for my new future.

10-02-15_8-04-31 PM

I still had no family or children, but I had the white fence. It wasn’t much but it was a start, and I knew this was the right one when we visited it. It was too big for me, but I saw the fence as a good luck charm and couldn’t resist. It was a sign, or a good omen or whatever people called it, and that was just what I needed after everything that had happened.

The previous owners were still in the process of moving, so I had a month to pack everything up and prepare for the move myself. I wasn’t looking forward to living in this reminder for another day, but would do what I always did to cope with a bad situation. I would throw myself into work. Chief  Chau insisted I take some time off to adjust and to allow myself time to mourn, but I didn’t want to be alone and there was a lot of work to get done. Blaine had left a minefield in his wake, and while I wasn’t allowed to interrogate him myself I could still research everything else he had had a hand in for the past several years. His accomplices within the station soon sang and gave us all the information we needed, worrying as it all was. They had not been the only corrupt agents working for him. He had people everywhere, from the smallest shops working as spies to important politicians. It seemed there was no end to his corruptions, and I couldn’t wait to get stuck in. Without realising it he had done me a favour. He had robbed me of my partner and man I loved, but he had also given me something to focus on. Something important.

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Mum, Grandma and Grandpa Milan came over a week later for Emery’s funeral. I had had too much time to think in this empty house, and had begun to question some things I should just be leaving alone. There was nothing I could do to answer them now but I wanted to ask Grandma and Grandpa Milan when I had a quiet moment alone with them.

For now I was just grateful that I wasn’t alone. Mum stayed with me for two weeks after the funeral, and only went back briefly for Momma’s funeral and wake. I was dreading another ceremony but was glad to be out of the house, too.

10-02-15_6-07-23 PM

Being amongst all those people was overwhelming. There were so many I had never even met before, people who had worked with Momma, her business partners, and old employees who still held her in high regard. It was great seeing all these people coming together and tell stories about my Momma, but at the same time it was too much. The house soon felt crowded, and I felt faint. I needed some fresh air, and headed upstairs to the balcony.

10-02-15_6-09-14 PM

The warm breeze was just what I had needed. It was familiar and comforting, and made me feel about as good as I could feel.

It was strange to be back. So much had changed that I could see from my little spot, but it was still exactly the same place as I had grown up in, too. The rocks and palm trees were the same, the sand and the air were the same, and even the small convenience store off in the distance was the same. So much had changed since I had moved, but my home town was still my home town. It was comforting to see it like this.

10-02-15_6-09-40 PM

My childhood seemed like a lifetime ago. My eighteenth birthday felt like it had happened centuries ago, when in reality only a few years had passed. I could still smell Momma’s cooking, feeling the sweat on my skin from working out all morning with Mum, and I could still here Marvin’s laughter in the garden. I wondered where he was now. If he was still in Riverview, or if he had moved up in the world. Whether he had gotten married by now, and what she’d be like.

I sighed. Marvin was still alive and kicking but he seemed as far away as Emery in that moment.

Behind me the door opened, and two sets of footsteps entered the balcony behind me. I didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. I still recognised the sound.

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“Hey, sweety” Grandpa Milan said.

“We thought you looked like you needed to talk.”

I nodded, finally turning around as the chance I’d been waiting for presented itself.

“I do. Are you sure now is a good moment?” As much as I needed to get this question of my chest I didn’t want Mum to be alone today.

“Of course. Don’t worry about Lilli, Gemma’s friends are keeping her company.”

I awkwardly fiddled with my hands as they sat down on the bench, not really knowing what to do with myself. Now that I finally had the chance to ask my question I wasn’t sure that I still wanted to know the answer.

10-02-15_6-14-23 PM

“How are you holding up?” Grandma asked, motioning for me to sit between them like we did when I was young, but I shook my head. I needed to feel the touch of air on my arms for this.

“Badly” I said truthfully. “I miss him, Grandma.” I didn’t care if she made a remark about how she had warned me not to fall in love. Right now I just needed to talk to someone.

“I’m sorry, sweety. Is there anything we can do?” I shook my head no. Unless they had a way of bringing Emery back I wasn’t interested, and that was out of the question. Nothing else would do.

Without wanting to waste more time, I asked my question.

10-02-15_6-16-39 PM

“Is it my fault he’s gone, Grandpa?” Their eyes went wide, and Grandma reached out for my hands.

“Of course it isn’t. You couldn’t know that lunatic would be there or what he would do. Why would you think this was your fault?”

“Because you told me not to fall in love, and I did it anyway. You told me our family can’t live happily ever after like I wanted to, but I tried to do it anyway. Am I being punished?” My nose stung and my eyes burnt, but I didn’t care. I was far beyond the age where I couldn’t let anyone see me cry.

Their faces had turned ashen, and I knew I was right. This was my fault. Emery was gone because of me.

10-02-15_6-14-37 PM

“Sweety, that’s not true. The spirits would never punish us like this.” I wanted to believe him but I couldn’t.

“How do you know? Have you asked them?”

He looked uncomfortable in his seat when he replied. “No, but if you really want me to I can.”

I nodded. “Please?”

“I don’t know when I’ll be able to, but I’ll give you a call once I know if you like.”

Next to him Grandma shook her head.

10-02-15_6-14-30 PM

“Now, listen here, sweetheart. You’re not being punished, his death had nothing to do with you. I know this is hard to hear, but people die and you are in a dangerous job. You both knew the risks when you signed up, or am I wrong?”

I sniffled, feeling like a little girl. “No. You’re right. But I can’t help but feel that he’d still be alive if I hadn’t interfered. I wanted to keep our relationship professional, Grandma, I really did.”

They both got up, hugging me from both sides at once. Holding on to my grandparents I cried into their clothes, the familiar smells not doing anything to comfort me.

“It’ll be all right, sweetheart. You’ll see.” I wanted to believe her more than anything, but the reality of our fate began to really sink in. I had told myself I could have a family and love, but maybe there was nothing I could do to get either. I had the very beginnings of love with Emery, and he had been taken away from me. Mum had managed to cheat it, but only because she made Gemma work her butt off. They hadn’t spent as much time together as they should have done, just to be allowed to be together at all.

“How do you cope?”

Milan stepped away as Grandma held me close. “Your mother was very lucky with Gemma, but you saw how little time they got to spend together. When they did they were tired from their careers. And I barely left my office, Soph.” The reminder of Emery stung like nothing had ever stung before. I could almost hear my nickname in his voice, pretend my Grandma’s arms were his. “I used Lilli’s father, and never saw him again. He never even knew I was pregnant, and Lilli never knew him.”

I didn’t know if her words helped or not. “So you focused on your career?”

Grandma pulled away just enough to be able to look into my eyes and cup my face with her hands. “I did. It helped.” There was the hint of something else behind her eyes. Did Grandma regret not being able to fall in love? Mum and I had given her a hard time for always reminding us that we couldn’t fall in love, but it had never occurred to me that Grandma wanted her happily ever after just as much as I did.

“What do you say we go back inside? I’ll get you a drink.”

“In a minute, you go ahead.” I needed to be alone, and think. Or not think.

10-02-15_6-14-45 PM

This wasn’t fair. I wasn’t sure I could do what Grandma had done, and have someone’s baby without any love involved. I couldn’t use someone like that. How could anyone? How had Grandma? Knowing that I’d force my child into the same fate I now suffered through made it even worse. How could I be so cruel?

I wondered what the universe would do if I just never had children. Milan had said that my family was important, vital to the world’s future. Did I really have to chose between passing on our fate and saving the world? Between my child and everybody else? How could anyone make such a decision?

I didn’t have to wait long to realise that the decision was no longer mine to make.

10-02-15_6-47-52 PM

I found out a week before moving into my new house. Our new house.

I was pregnant.

 

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Tour of the house:

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1st Floor:

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2nd Floor

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I tried to make it small but cosy, and am really pleased with how it turned out :3 Although the garden needs work 😛
You’ll see the nursery in the next update, along with gen 4 😉

3.11

10-02-15_6-31-11 PM

Waiting for Emery to wake up was torture. All I could hear was the ticking of the small clock by his bed, the rustling of carts and feet outside his room and the faint buzzing of the cheap TV on the opposite wall.

I had spoken to the doctor who looked after him briefly before coming in. It didn’t look good. Emery was trying to stay positive and made everyone smile, but his wound was too deep for them to remain hopeful. The nurses said pretty much the same thing.

I needed him to wake up, so I could see for myself. I had never wanted anyone to be okay this badly. If he died because of this it’d be my fault. I shouldn’t have gotten him involved, but instead I told him about the notes and that bad feeling I had about Blaine. If it hadn’t been for me he’d-

“Hey, beautiful” he said as he woke up, yawning but pulling a strained face in the process and carefully sitting up. He was smiling, but his voice sounded heavy. I knew better than to pretend it was from the meds he was on.

10-02-15_6-33-09 PM

“Hey, you. How are you feeling?” I hoped the sinking feeling I experienced wasn’t showing. He didn’t need my worry added to his list of pains.

“Been better, but not too bad, all things considered. I’m mostly tired. I’ve no idea what’s in those pills they give me but they make me drowsy.” I smiled, hearing him talk like everything was fine. He almost sounded like his old self, but the pain on his face betrayed him. Sitting up wasn’t easy for him, and judging by the creases on his forehead neither was breathing.

“Is there anything I can get you?” This was my fault, I had gotten him into this mess, and I wanted to make amends in any way I could.

“Well” he said, grinning “there’s one thing but I don’t think it’d be appropriate for a hospital room. The doctor could come in at any moment.”

I couldn’t help but smile back. “I meant like a magazine, or a sandwich.”

“Oh, right. No, I’m good. I haven’t been very hungry, I think it’s that stuff they serve us here. It doesn’t leave much to look forward to.”

I leaned in and gave him a kiss on his forehead. He squeezed my hand but there was barely any strength there. “I’ll cook you dinner once you’re out. How about spaghetti and meatballs?”

10-02-15_6-34-07 PM

“Listen, Soph, this is important.” I steeled myself, knowing exactly what he was about to say but not wanting to hear it. “You should speak to my doctors if you haven’t already. I don’t think I’ll be able to make it to that dinner.”

“Don’t say that.”

“Soph-”

“No, don’t. Don’t even think like that. I need you to get better so you can come home and I can cook you those meatballs.”

Again he squeezed my hand, but the lack of pressure did nothing to reassure me. “Of course I’m trying, Soph. But it’s not entirely up to me. The guys here are great, they really know what they’re doing and they’re doing everything they can, but I’ve seen how they look at each other when they think I’m asleep. I’ve seen them shake their heads. I don’t want to die, Soph, and I don’t want to leave you but this is out of my hands and I need you to prepare yourself. I love you.”

I didn’t know what to say. How could he expect me to prepare myself for that? How could he be so calm?

Not wanting to cry and make him feel worse I focused on the one thing of any meaning.

10-02-15_6-34-58 PM

“I love you, too. Now hurry up and get better.”

The creases on his face softened a little when he kissed me. “Fine, I’ll try. But no promises.”

It was better than nothing. I knew there was no pushing him, but at least I knew that he’d try.

10-02-15_6-54-00 PM

To take my mind of Emery I threw myself into work. There was a lot to do, and for the first time in my life I was sitting on the other side in the confessional room. Thanks to all the evidence we had – thanks to Emery – it didn’t take long to persecute him and lock him away. Hearing that former Chief Parker had been arrested and taken into custody caused quite a stir within the department. I had been right. There were a lot of cops I couldn’t trust, and seeing him locked away like any other criminal caused most of them to come forward and revolt. They were taken down easily, and sold out others who had also been on their side. To think that one man had corrupted the police department by himself was disgusting, but it was over now and we were slowly working through all the other names mixed up in this. Names I had trusted, once. People I had believed to be good officers.

10-02-15_6-56-22 PM

The new Chief was like a breath of fresh air. Chief Layla Chau was as disgusted and taken aback by everything that had happened as I was. Like most others she had seen part of it – officers who were getting promoted when they shouldn’t have been, unaccounted pay rises – but hadn’t believed the corruption to run so deep. The week he had come to my house to finish me and Emery she had begun a small investigation of her own, and had waited for a reason to question him. When Emery had called the police she had jumped at it. It was the reason they had gotten to my house so quickly. She had been waiting for the right moment and had been ready when Emery had handed it to her.

She offered me her condolences but took me off the case since I was too close to everyone involved. I wanted to argue but knew that I couldn’t. She was right, it was too personal. If I was the one interrogating him he would leave the room in bad shape, or not at all. After everything that had happened already we didn’t need any more trouble, so taking me off his case was the right thing to do.

And I was okay with that. I had sworn to myself that I would see him locked up, and I had. My work was done, where he was concerned.

10-02-15_6-59-32 PM

He got the last cell at the end of the row. We literally shoved him into the the loneliest, darkest hole we could find. Not only was he a wanted criminal but he had also betrayed their trust. In a way this was personal to every last one of us, but no one was more relieved to see him locked up than me. It was over. Blaine Raegan was finally finished.

10-02-15_6-56-08 PM

Kim Humphreys, an officer who had started shortly before I had, was hit particularly hard by the news. She was a skilled cop and Blaine had seen potential in her. He had mentored her from the day she had started her career here, and she had looked up to him. Kim had had suspicions but like most of my colleagues she had not wanted to believe them.

She was not the only one affected by the news, either. Most cops had looked up to him, some had even idolised him, and they wouldn’t go easy on him now that his betrayal had been uncovered.

Together we compiled a list of all other cops we suspected, and we cleared out the office in no time. By the time we were done almost half of our officers were gone, a shocking amount of which had been in higher positions. It opened up a lot of positions and we all steeled ourselves for numerous job interviews and a lot of paperwork in the near future.

10-02-15_6-56-52 PM

It felt good to finally have arrived at an end. I had achieved my long-term goal, we had raided the station of corrupt cops and I was excited for the future, but none of it seemed as rewarding without Emery here. I still held out hope that he’d be better soon and would come back, until I received the call I had been dreading two weeks after Blaine had attacked me.

Emery was gone. My best friend and only man I had ever cared this strongly about had passed away.